Priest as Mirror

One of the less pleasant parts of being a priest is the fact that people who are in some sort of acute crisis—whether they’re working on childhood trauma or just dealing with some sort of chemical imbalance—tend to seek priests out and project their issues onto the priest. Priests tend to be ‘safe’ to project onto, both because we’re acutely aware of the state of crisis the person is in and because we tend to have resolved enough of our own issues to make us less likely to overreact to that projection.

Absolutely none of this means it doesn’t suck. It is not fun to wake up to people telling you second hand that someone is making videos claiming you’re up to things that would never occur to you, or whatever the person does in response to their crisis state.

But like everything else involved in spiritual work, it’s an opportunity to learn and grow.

Our job, as priests, is the work of healing. We’re going to see people in all sorts of states, ranging from whatever their normal happens to be to psychosis, if they’re capable of it. We’re going to get accused of all sorts of things because, as venues for healing, people will dredge up their issues in front of us, whether they recognize they’re bringing them up or not, hoping that they can be healed of the unbearable weight of their guilt and pain.

Despite the initial flush of outrage, surprise, and/or anger that happens when you find out what they’ve done, it’s not terribly hard to come back to understanding: as a priest, I am here as an emissary of divine love.

This does not mean I do not respond. It does mean that whatever response I give is tempered by the knowledge that the divine loves us and wants us to get better—whatever I do to respond must have in mind that person’s healing, though that may mean staying away from the person if it is not for me to help them.

Whatever I do to respond must demonstrate that I know they are suffering or they wouldn’t be behaving this way, and must demonstrate honor to the divine in them, and the divine.

It is not so hard to remember to love.